Another journal sort of piece from the inside

This is another journal sort of piece that I wrote in prison but hung onto until I got out rather than run the risk of it disappearing in the system if I’d posted it…

25th December 2005. 68 days done, only 23 still to go.

Merry Christmas from the Bowels of the Devil, also known as Darwin Correctional Centre. It must be about 3.30pm. We’ve just been locked up for the night. The day’s been overcast but we haven’t had any rain. At about 1pm I had a visit from 3 friends. Rob Inder-Smith, Diana Rickard and Justin Tutty. Justin mentioned that he’d tried to give the prison officers an Xmas present but they wouldn’t accept it. A packet of biscuits. They might have thought it was a bribe, or maybe they thought there might be poison in them! Anyway it was great to see the three of them. Rob had his Xmas necktie on, to go with his usual get-up of shorts and loud shirt. I could only talk to one person at a time on the phone, even though we could all see each other through the windows. It was a ‘closed visit,’ no physical contact. A hell of a lot better than no visits at all, which I was expecting as part of the LOP (Loss Of Privileges) penalty now that I’m ‘down the back’ in the punishment block.

This is my second night in Cell 3, B Block (Maximum Security.) Next door is Jeffrey Wanambi from Oenpelli in Cell 4. We share a small exercise yard but we are never allowed out of our cells at the same time. As usual I had a shower under the outside shower in the yard, the concrete exercise yard, before the 3pm lock-up.

Locked in my cell for Xmas lunch, which I ate in the dark as the screw didn’t turn on the cell light as I requested. So at first I couldn’t see what I was eating, until my eyes gradually got used to the dark. Slices of 3 different types of meat, a pineapple ring from a tin, and salad. I’ll remember this Xmas for the rest of my life all right! Thought they’d let us eat our lunch in the yard down the end, as has been the case the last 2 days. But no. Those styrofoam disposable meal trays the lunch was in, and yesterday’s evening meal too, were something new too. I’d never seen those before. Still aren’t getting my breakfast bran since moving from M Block. I hope the kitchen gets the message soon that I’m in B Block again now. I keep mentioning that bran to the officers. Damien Hillen’s in Cell 1 and Ben in Cell 2. Khan went back up to the main B Block wing after finishing his 21 days in the Punishment Cells yesterday morning.

I’ve filled in a Request form to be allowed to visit Matty Rourke in C Block. There’s doubt as to whether I’ll be allowed to see him, as I’m on Loss of Privileges. Saw him on Thursday though. Twice! By chance, with Fiona, in the Visiting Area in the afternoon. Serendipity. Is that the word? A happy coincidence? We got a chance to exchange a few words. Filled in a medical request form too, asking for a blood test to make sure my liver’s doing OK, holding up all right under the regime of daily anti-fungal medication for the fingernail fungal infection. I’ll give both those forms to an officer tomorrow morning…

New Year’s Day, 2006. Happy New Year, Ha!Ha!Ha!

Thoughts of the Day

The strength of us all could demolish the wall. But you chose to walk through the door. You chose to walk through the door. Darwin Correctional Centre. Murderous bastards. Who killed Douglas Scott? In 1985 in Darwin Prison? Why no justice after 20 years? Fuck, I can’t wait to get out of here. I am sick to death of seeing people, myself included, being treated like animals inside this evil, horrible place of death, misery and suffering.