Raiders of the lost arc

Host: That the force is really with you . . . well at least two superheroes, one renegade bushranger and Santa, have joined the movement, using their superpowers to protest against the Northern Territory Government’s drug law reforms. Matt Henger, our reporter, joined the fantastic four who’ve gone to the green side on their latest and most dangerous mission.

Gary Meyerhoff on megaphone: “This is a community service announcement just warning people . . . we’re dangerous criminals, we’re marijuana smokers and we’re about to hand ourselves in at the Darwin Police Station . . . four serious criminals here that have been apprehended by our friendly police officer Magilla Gorilla, and he’s taking us to the police station where we will hand ourselves in for smoking cannabis.

Matt Henger: after scouring the city, I tracked down our superheroes in Darwin’s Smith Street mall. It was there that Batman, Robin, Ned Kelly and Santa were divulging a secret plan to just about anyone in earshot of the megaphone.

Gary Meyerhoff: Be warned that we are serious criminals, we are cannabis smokers, and it is our civic duty to hand ourselves in at the Darwin Police Station.

Matt Henger: Greeted with a secret handshake, Batman, better known as Gary Meyer’off, told me the four were unhappy with proposed changes to the NT’s drug laws which would see an end to the infringement notice system for pot offences and reforms to make it easier for police to raid houses, shops and nightclubs for drugs.

Gary Meyerhoff: Under the current Government, the police actually need to have um, you know much more evidence to get a search warrant for a premises, a house or a nightclub, but under this new legislation, you know, they just need to get less evidence to prove to a magistrate that there maybe - there MAYBE – dealing or drug activity happening in that house and that house is declared a drug house, and the police no longer need a warrant to raid that house. They can raid it as many times as they want, ten times a day . . .

Matt Henger: The fantastic four chose high noon to make our stand and it was just about then when a mall cop showed up flexing his muscles and overpowering our heroes, forcing them to begin our journey a little earlier.

Gary Meyerhoff: . . . freedom of Speech . . .

Deep Male Voice: You want freedom of speech you need a permit mate, OK, for the mall.

Gary Meyerhoff: So you’re not going to let us make an announcements in the mall?

Deep Male Voice: Nah nah, not allowed to mate.

Gary Meyerhoff: We’re moving down to the police station anyway.

Deep Male Voice (over Gary Meyerhoff): Do you have permission to do so?

Matt Henger: Along the way, Batman uncoded a secret message on the wall.

Gary Meyerhoff: . . . marijuana posters here that one of our supporters has stuck on a window and it’s been ah, scratched up and it says, ‘have a haircut have a bath, get a job and get a life’, and somebody has put, ‘I’ve got a job and short hair and I smoke cannabis’. I think that’s a lot of people in the Territory that have a job and have short hair, that smoke cannabis.

Matt Henger: Half-way to the station, and my mere mortalness was taking its toll. ‘And ah, still making our way down to the play station in ah, Smith Street in Darwin, it’s a bit of a walk, it’s ah, it’s a bloody hot afternoon, too, I can tell you that. Dunno about a smoke, but I can definitely do with a drink after this.’

Gary Meyerhoff: Santa has come all the way from the North Pole to admit that he smoked cannabis on December 25th, 2001, when he was in Darwin. Somebody left him some biscuits and a glass of milk and a joint of sinsemilla, and so Santa, being a good civic-minded citizen, is also handing himself in at the Darwin local police station. We’re now arriving in the Darwin Police Station, we’re being handed in.

Superintendent Bob Rennie: Stuart (yes) Robert (yo) Scott (grunt) Chris??? Gary (yep).

Superintendent Bob Rennie: This is your full and correct name and address.

Gary Meyerhoff: It is.

Superintendent Bob Rennie: And you signed this statement in front of a commissioner of oaths?

Gary Meyerhoff: That’s right.

Superintendent Bob Rennie: Thanks very much gentlemen, we appreciate your assistance in the matter, what we’ll do is ah, we’ll take it on board and we’ll investigate it, and if we decide there’s sufficient evidence here for a prosecution, you may receive a summons in the mail, or you may receive a drug-infringement notice. Thanks very much for your time.

Gary Meyerhoff: Thank you.

Superintendent Bob Rennie: Thank you.

Matt Henger: While our masked, bearded and tin-hatted crusaders did manage to walk away, their leader Gary Meyer’off, didn’t think they were going to be so lucky.

Gary Meyerhoff: We thought it was fifty-fifty, that a 50 per cent that they’d arrest us . . . uhm on the spot, ah, but yes, I am quite surprised, especially with the hard line that they’re taking um, and you know, we are serious offenders, we smoke cannabis.

Matt Henger: And what now for our superheroes?

Gary Meyerhoff: We just need to raise funds now, to ah hire our costumes, at our trial.

Host: Batman and his band of merry men pursing their fight in the Top End for the right to smoke cannabis on the morning show at six-minutes to midday, that’s it from us today.

Newshawk: http://www.napnt.org
Pubdate: Fri, 12 April 2002
Source: Australian Broadcasting Corporation (Triple J)
Email: comments@your.abc.net.au
Copyright: 2005 Australian Broadcasting Corporation
Website: http://www.abc.net.au/
Reporter: Matt Henger

This broadcast was transcribed by NAP member Rob Inder-Smith.